Verbal Abuse
When
Kristin realized that I wasn't going to take her back as my fiancée, her
verbal abuse restarted and reached new
heights. She must have picked up more demons in USA or from the
Indian wolf
because so many insults and false accusations poured out of her mouth so fast
and for so long without a break that there was no time to confront them
one-by-one. All I could say to try to stop the torrent of her verbal abuse was "Stop ... Stop talking! ... STOP TALKING!" but she wouldn't
stop until she saw that I became as upset as her so that our
levels of emotional agitation matched.
When I first met Kristin, I was forty-five but few believed it as I looked and felt a decade younger. After six years of casting out demons and dealing with her dissociative identity disorder, as well as eight semesters with very little sleep in China and two years of dealing with her borderline personality disorder, my hair had turned completely white and I now looked and felt a decade older than my age.
When Kristin launched into her verbal abuse, I began to experience sharp chest pains and had to physically get away from her, which made her feel even more rejected and lash out even more. I didn't know that words could cause physical pain. I was never bullied in professional or social circles or in school, so I had never before experienced verbal or any other abuse, let alone abuse like this. And this of course was the protector alter, not the nice alter of Kristin whom I had known for the first four years.
My personality also began to change. I had always had a very calm and collected demeanor. Now, I had a short fuse. I still didn't lash back out at her, but felt the anger, which I buried.
When away from her, I sometimes thought to myself that this is what happens when a physically and emotionally healthy middle-aged man absorbs verbal abuse for a couple of years. Had I been raped for the first twenty years of my life as Kristin had been, I was sure that I would be far more abusive than this traumatized alter of Kristin.